School Board Letter
Tipp City Schools Restrooms
03/15/2022Filed in: Gay Issues
A letter from the LGBT Center to Tipp City School Board…
Dear School Board Member,
Thank you for your dedication and commitment to the betterment of ALL students. I must also ask your forgiveness for this rather long email, but I hope you will take the time to read it through that you may understand the gravity of those impacted.
Right now you are being bombarded with outcries over the very complex issues surrounding restrooms and transgender and intersexed students. In a perfect world where budgets and properties are not an issue, you could just add gender-neutral restrooms to each building and resolve a lot of issues. I know the reality is that you do not have unlimited budgets and deal with older buildings that do not easily adapt without major expense. So the dilemma grows.
On one hand, you have parents that will tell you we do not care about these kids. They are different than my kid, so we do not want to associate with them. We have whole states such as Florida that want to legislate it to the point of saying you cannot say “Gay”, if we do not say it, they don’t exist, and if they don’t exist then we do not have to make accommodations, respect them, or acknowledge them. As parents and grandparents of real children, I do not have to tell you how harmful and dangerous this stance really is, what if one of these kids was your child, one of your grandchild, what kind of mental toll would it place on them if they were told, your invisible and do not exist?
National statics tell us that 1 out of 10 people are LGBTQ+ (lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, transgender, intersexed, or simply identify as queer plus). Or ten kids out of one hundred, yes this makes for a minority or a smaller group but these kids are real and important too. We cannot just let them fall between the cracks. Even more alarming is that of those who do self-identify as Q+, 42% of these kids seriously consider attempting suicide within the past year and MORE THAN HALF OF TRANSGENDER AND NOBININARY YOUTH WILL ATTEMPT. Now imagine if we told them they were invisible or do not exist, how will this drive up those numbers? 12% of these students are white, 31% are native/indigenous youth, 21% are multiracial youth and 18% of Latino youth, and 12% of Asian/pacific islander youth.
Michelle Page said, “One of the greatest traumas that gender and sexual minority students experience is not bullying but invisibility and silence. When queer students are not visible in the curriculum on the social networks of school when the school is silent about their experience this creates feelings of disenfranchisement and rejection. It creates “stigmatizing messages that these students are not valued students, identities are erased and invalidated.” Please do not allow this to happen, don’t let our kids be erased. We have students that each morning will not eat or drink anything each morning of school. Who will not eat or drink while at school, just to ensure they do not have to use the restroom while at school so as to not put themselves at risk while using a restroom. I do not have to tell you how this can lead to reductions in concentration and lower test scores and simply not healthy!
I realize it is complex, especially with aging buildings, limited real estate, and limited budgets so new buildings are not necessarily on the table. Ignoring the situation is not the answer either.
We can begin with offering respect and teaching respect which can begin with the simple use of pronouns, when we use someone’s preferred pronoun, we are telling them I see you, I respect you, I care about you all in a simple pronoun. Here in the United States, we are used to only two: he & she, but in other cultures, there are many more. Indigenous folks have seven; Asian cultures have twelve, and even on Facebook if you click on “custom” in this area you will see there are 72 different pronouns listed. Why is this important?
According to a study done in 2018, ny Russell, Polliet, and Grossman publishing in the Journal of Adolescent Health, their study showed a direct link to the reduction of depressive, suicidal idealizations, and suicidal behaviors among transgender and nonconforming Individuals when using chosen name and pronoun. By using the chosen names and pronouns we saw a reduction in depression by 71%, reduced thoughts of suicide by 34%, and reduced suicide attempts by 65%. This is huge; by simply using a preferred pronoun we acknowledge them and maybe save their lives. Again, what if this was your child or grandchild? This little bit would be worth it.
When it comes to the restrooms, we cannot always find the space to build new restrooms that are gender-neutral or all-gender restrooms, perhaps the bolder move would be to find one restroom to make an all-gender restroom by installing all restrooms with only stalls and stall doors on them that have very minimal cracks between the doors and stalls, so each user has their own privacy. Yes, the stall doors will have some cost to them but far less than new facilities and it will restore privacy and respect. It may take some monitoring at first to ensure all are respected in this space, but personal respect is worth it as we teach, I see you, I hear you, I respect you.
I know you care about our kids and their education which is why you chose to run for the school board in the first place, please protect ALL kids, including our transgender and nonconforming kids to ensure they are seen, heard, and respected, give them a chance to grow and flourish, I know it is odd to think it can begin with a pronoun and a restroom stall, but it is a profound start. Thank You!
Sincerely, Randy Phillips
Randy Phillips, E. D. (He, Him, His)
The Greater Dayton LGBT Center
24 N. Jefferson St STE 200
Dayton, OH 45402
(937) 274-1776 center
(937) 623-1590 cell
info@daytonlgbtcenter.org
Make A Donation To the Center
Dear School Board Member,
Thank you for your dedication and commitment to the betterment of ALL students. I must also ask your forgiveness for this rather long email, but I hope you will take the time to read it through that you may understand the gravity of those impacted.
Right now you are being bombarded with outcries over the very complex issues surrounding restrooms and transgender and intersexed students. In a perfect world where budgets and properties are not an issue, you could just add gender-neutral restrooms to each building and resolve a lot of issues. I know the reality is that you do not have unlimited budgets and deal with older buildings that do not easily adapt without major expense. So the dilemma grows.
On one hand, you have parents that will tell you we do not care about these kids. They are different than my kid, so we do not want to associate with them. We have whole states such as Florida that want to legislate it to the point of saying you cannot say “Gay”, if we do not say it, they don’t exist, and if they don’t exist then we do not have to make accommodations, respect them, or acknowledge them. As parents and grandparents of real children, I do not have to tell you how harmful and dangerous this stance really is, what if one of these kids was your child, one of your grandchild, what kind of mental toll would it place on them if they were told, your invisible and do not exist?
National statics tell us that 1 out of 10 people are LGBTQ+ (lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, transgender, intersexed, or simply identify as queer plus). Or ten kids out of one hundred, yes this makes for a minority or a smaller group but these kids are real and important too. We cannot just let them fall between the cracks. Even more alarming is that of those who do self-identify as Q+, 42% of these kids seriously consider attempting suicide within the past year and MORE THAN HALF OF TRANSGENDER AND NOBININARY YOUTH WILL ATTEMPT. Now imagine if we told them they were invisible or do not exist, how will this drive up those numbers? 12% of these students are white, 31% are native/indigenous youth, 21% are multiracial youth and 18% of Latino youth, and 12% of Asian/pacific islander youth.
Michelle Page said, “One of the greatest traumas that gender and sexual minority students experience is not bullying but invisibility and silence. When queer students are not visible in the curriculum on the social networks of school when the school is silent about their experience this creates feelings of disenfranchisement and rejection. It creates “stigmatizing messages that these students are not valued students, identities are erased and invalidated.” Please do not allow this to happen, don’t let our kids be erased. We have students that each morning will not eat or drink anything each morning of school. Who will not eat or drink while at school, just to ensure they do not have to use the restroom while at school so as to not put themselves at risk while using a restroom. I do not have to tell you how this can lead to reductions in concentration and lower test scores and simply not healthy!
I realize it is complex, especially with aging buildings, limited real estate, and limited budgets so new buildings are not necessarily on the table. Ignoring the situation is not the answer either.
We can begin with offering respect and teaching respect which can begin with the simple use of pronouns, when we use someone’s preferred pronoun, we are telling them I see you, I respect you, I care about you all in a simple pronoun. Here in the United States, we are used to only two: he & she, but in other cultures, there are many more. Indigenous folks have seven; Asian cultures have twelve, and even on Facebook if you click on “custom” in this area you will see there are 72 different pronouns listed. Why is this important?
According to a study done in 2018, ny Russell, Polliet, and Grossman publishing in the Journal of Adolescent Health, their study showed a direct link to the reduction of depressive, suicidal idealizations, and suicidal behaviors among transgender and nonconforming Individuals when using chosen name and pronoun. By using the chosen names and pronouns we saw a reduction in depression by 71%, reduced thoughts of suicide by 34%, and reduced suicide attempts by 65%. This is huge; by simply using a preferred pronoun we acknowledge them and maybe save their lives. Again, what if this was your child or grandchild? This little bit would be worth it.
When it comes to the restrooms, we cannot always find the space to build new restrooms that are gender-neutral or all-gender restrooms, perhaps the bolder move would be to find one restroom to make an all-gender restroom by installing all restrooms with only stalls and stall doors on them that have very minimal cracks between the doors and stalls, so each user has their own privacy. Yes, the stall doors will have some cost to them but far less than new facilities and it will restore privacy and respect. It may take some monitoring at first to ensure all are respected in this space, but personal respect is worth it as we teach, I see you, I hear you, I respect you.
I know you care about our kids and their education which is why you chose to run for the school board in the first place, please protect ALL kids, including our transgender and nonconforming kids to ensure they are seen, heard, and respected, give them a chance to grow and flourish, I know it is odd to think it can begin with a pronoun and a restroom stall, but it is a profound start. Thank You!
Sincerely, Randy Phillips
Randy Phillips, E. D. (He, Him, His)
The Greater Dayton LGBT Center
24 N. Jefferson St STE 200
Dayton, OH 45402
(937) 274-1776 center
(937) 623-1590 cell
info@daytonlgbtcenter.org
Make A Donation To the Center